When I Was a Child

I dreamed of grown up moments
and now
I wish I were just a child again
when all I knew was innocence…

when I could cry as loud as I wanted
when I would stand on a chair
only to sing an unclear song
and still my little mates would clap their hands

when all I could draw were
a cloud, a mountain, a house, a coconut tree
and a butterfly bigger than the tree
and got the whole praise for that

when I would run in the rain -
naked without being ashamed
when I could just being lazy the whole day
and still foods will be served there

when no awareness required
when understandings was not of concern

0h wait a sec...

I can see the difference
in there, I wasn’t aware that it was love
I didn’t know that I was living a life
I didn’t understand that it was me


I like the now
I like this time
right now

though I need to struggle for certificates
rite… also for knowledge and friendships - of course (hah!)
though I need to think of going to work
to maintain Rupiah in my pocket ($$$)

though I’m aware of my demanding needs
and try to find ways to fulfill them
I can see me now on the way
of searching and living

though I don’t understand all things
I don’t have to understand everything anyway…

I begin to know what love is
what to love and being loved is
maybe it is all (K'Uli)


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